Saturday, October 1, 2011


Lessons along the way

In anticipation of the film's release, Family Life Today did a series of interviews with the producers of Courageous, Alex and Stephen Kendrick (Facing the Giants & Fireproof).  During the interview, Stephen was asked, "What was the most courageous thing you've ever done."  I expected him to say something like becoming a filmmaker or saving some little kids out of a burning building a la Ponyboy in The Outsiders.  Instead, I was surprised at his answer.

"I went through a season of my life of depression, where I was battling with the Lord.  I was so overwhelmed that I felt like the God I was serving had abandoned me.  In the midst of that, I came to the place where I chose to cling to the Lord when I felt like He was my enemy.  It was very difficult during that time.  But my dad sent me something, and he said, 'The greatest test of faith is when you feel like God has abandoned you... will you cling to Him then?'  And Job did that.  He said, 'Though God slay me, yet will I trust in Him.'  And when you feel like God is against you and He's turning on you, you know, we look in Scripture, and he has promised us He will never leave us or forsake us.  But He will allow seasons of our lives when He is silent or He backs away.  That is our test of faith.  It's easy to have faith in the Lord when He's showing up and He's providing and He's involved in your life.  But when you feel like He is a million miles away and he doesn't care about you, you have to cling to Him then.  Jesus was so loyal to the Father, at the point of going to the cross, He said, nevertheless, not my will, but Yours be done.  After 'My God, my God, why have you forsaken me'... a few moments later... into Thy hands I commit my Spirit.  To the same one whom He felt was forsaking Him.  I just tell people, when I look back, I don't know anything that was more difficult than that."
I can't tell you how much I needed to hear these words.  This week, my depression has been an increasingly unwelcome companion once again.   I can't seem to figure out this chemistry experiment otherwise known as Linda.  To hear Stephen's testimony... that battling forsaken feelings, yet trusting and having faith anyway, was the hardest and most courageous thing he'd ever done, gives me tremendous encouragement.

Because most of the time I feel like such a wimp.

But to think of it in this light... that it takes courage.  That I am making the right decision to fight for faith.  That this may be one of the hardest battles I will ever fight.  That God still keeps His promises.  That He wouldn't let me go through this test for no reason.  That others have fought this battle and emerged with Jesus, victorious.

These thoughts give me a renewed hope.  And help me remember what I am fighting for.

And I need that... everyday.

Thank you, Jesus, for knowing my heart and giving me this portion today.

(By the way... did anyone go out to see the movie?  How was it??)



CoachZ said...

You are the most courageous person I know. You've been through so much this year and the fact you have survived gives Glory to God! Love you babe!

Sandy said...

My Darling Daughter,

Each time I read a chapter in your Journey to Charis, I weep. I always want to write a comment of encouragement to you, but I can only picture the horrific time that you have been going through...because I saw it all first hand...and words fail me. And I cry.

And now, guess what you have done! You have written in this post the very things that I should have said to you...that Jesus has promised He will never leave you or forsake you...that God keeps His promises...that He wouldn't let you go through this for no reason...that others have fought this battle and emerged with Jesus, victorious.

I pray for you, Sweet One. I so want this pain to be in the past and to see the new season that God will put in your life.

Thank you for being so transparent in sharing your journey so that perhaps even one person will be encouraged or informed or led to Christ as a result of your writings. You are amazing.

Love you with all my heart ♥♥♥♥

P.S. In college your verse was Prov. 16:3. I think you are living that right now. Who knew, back then, that you would have to go down this path to reach that success. Thank you for being such a courageous and devout Lovely Little Christian as your name, Linda Christine, implies.

Linda Z said...

Sheesh!! Now you guys are making ME cry!! I love you soooo much and I don't know what I would have done without both of you by my side.

Denise said...

"I came to the place where I chose to cling to the Lord when I felt like He was my enemy."

thank you for sharing these words. this was what God taught me during "the great depression" (the 3 years i battled mind, body, soul).

i would sing daily. "God, You are, You are God, You are God, God God."
trying to remind myself of what i knew, but was finding hard to believe.

in hind-sight (which is 20/20) i am thankful for that time. thankful for the sort of creature God was in his mercy growing me into. thankful for all the dying that had happened in me. thankful for the new security i had (have) in him. a security that isn't based on emotion, but KNOWING, like Job, He is the sovereign LORD and He's got me whether i feel it or not. He's got me. He's got you, friend.

did i share this link with you?
i know when we talked i had intended to.

Tamera Beardsley said...

Such a wise, thoughtful and uplifting post....your honesty and insight are such a blessing.

I usually read your posts and reflect on them before coming back to comment....your words and ideas are so profound I usually feel at a loss to adequately respond.....thank you so for sharing your life....

Anonymous said...

There is information regarding niacin and depression towards the middle/end of the video. You might want to check it out.

hannah singer said...

linda, thank you! i needed this, too! god is so faithful, so blessed through you.

i want to see this movie!

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