Wednesday, July 23, 2008

It Starts...

I just had a conversation with my 8-year-old. It went something like this...

J: The problem with cool guys is that they're always looking for hot girls.

Me: Hmmm.... What is a cool guy?

J: I don't know... like a guy that probably hangs out in a bar all the time.

Me: Hmmm.... What's a hot girl?

J: Well, probably a girl that's really proud of herself and is always trying to look "saxy."

Me: What does "saxy" mean?

J: I don't really know.

Me: So how do you think a guy should act?

J: Well, he should be really responsible and he should want to protect a girl. I want to do what God says.... protect women and not hurt them.

Me: How did you come to these conclusions?

J: Don't know.

I'm really quite unsure what to make of all this. I'm not even entirely sure how this all became part of his thought processes. I do know one thing, and that is, I am so glad that he wants to respect women... maybe this came, in part, from the incidents we've had with our neighbor, or from cumulative conversations we have had in past years, or from watching his dad. It's amazing what children can process and formulate in their minds when we think they aren't paying attention. It's like we planted little seeds that God watered and caused to grow and they suddenly sprouted. At about 7pm they sprouted... while we were just sittin' on the sofa. I just wasn't expecting that particular sprout.

Although I didn't let on.... I was a bit bummed about the usage of words like "hot" and "saxy." Call me old-fashioned, but I'm going to boldly admit here and now that I have issues with these words. I'm not even sure where Josh picked them up... we don't even have cable for pity's sake!! I guess they've just become part of the lexicon. When I was growing up, the lexicon included words like pretty, gorgeous, cute, or babe. I like these words far better. They seem to have a great deal more respect behind them, not just a blatant reference to a woman's sexuality. I may be wrong, but I don't think hot and sexy grow with a woman very well, whereas a woman can be beautiful at any age, from the inside out. Maybe I'm a hopeless romantic, or too poetic for my own good, but I'll take lovely, pretty, beautiful, alluring, cute, breathtaking, captivating, ravishing or any combination of the aforementioned adjectives over "hot" and "sexy" any day of the week and twice on Sunday. What about you?


nicole viola said...

I totally agree with you on the adjectives. But what a sweet little boy you have. Despite picking up those terms somewhere, he more importantly has picked up what you guys and the people you spend time with are modeling for him. I also loved how you asked questions to get to him to open up!

Joey, Katie & Judah said...

Oh, I am so not looking forward to those kinds of talks. I guess it happens gradually, but how awesome that despite his vocabulary his heart really got the point. That must be quite a reward in parenting, knowing that your hard work and seed planting is already bearing fruit.

Linda Z said...

Thanks you guys!! I hope I didn't sound as if I was mad at Josh for the vocab... I'm totally not! I'm just more bummed about the terms the culture is using these days. I think Josh's heart is really seeing past that and I'm so glad! I pray that God will continue to grow him in that!! The other day he said he had 2 marriage prospects and was telling me about the character qualities he liked in them... it was too cute!

And then there's Jason. Today, he said, "Mommy, I like your hair. You're beautiful." And then he gave me a big hug! Ok, can I just melt into a big puddle on the floor right now!! :)

Chrissie said...

It's so beautiful that you can have conversations like this with your son, even though they can be alarming!
Thanks for your kind words on flipflops and applesauce. I am having so much fun learning to be a mom.
Lots of love!

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